Hello friends we are here to discuss behavioural flexibility by flexibility i mean behavioural flexibility while discussing neurolinguistic programming what is flexibility so having flexibility means doing that both in our thinking and also our behaviours right from the beginning i keep on discussing the flexibility is very important in neurolinguistic programming you should have open minded you should not have a very narrow risen minded so being willing and open to be more flexible in life can open up new doors and give us new opportunities that we may not have considered possible for us yes that is the importance of flexibility so if you have open yourself to various opportunities naturally number of opportunities waiting for you so of course for lot of people feeling safe and comfortable means they are being flexible and being willing to change can feel like scary things to do so the key to introducingsome flexibility when we are fearful or what might result is to try something small and manageable first recognising that once we get out of out comfort zone in a small way it opens up choices and opinions that wouldnt have been there otherwise and puts what wefeared into perspective so it becomes easier yes that is flexibilitynow the person or element with the most flexibility in a group or system will have the most influence this is the law of requisite variety from system theory it means that the person with a most options and behavioural choices will control the system in any field the top in a field are those who have the most variety in their behaviour yes how to control how to lead i mean with various mode that is flexibility and behavioural flexibility so they have choicesof behaviour that their colleagues dont ah any time you limit your behavioural choices you give others the competitive edge if you are able to respond to any situation in a variety of ways you are more likely to get your outcome yes that is true that if you want your outcome give some respond to other situation also and give some more option toget the outcome that is flexibility so behavioural flexibility it is fourth pillar and many people make the mistake of despite repeatedly failing using the same technique over and over again to try to achieve their outcome knowing what are outcomes are and using our sensory acuity to observe what is happening the information which is fed back to us allows to make changes in our behaviour if necessary so basically if something is not working then try a different approach so however many people find themselves lacking in behavioural flexibility so if you are pitching your business idea and using your sensory acuity you can see that your potential investor is sitting arms folded looking away to the side they are probablylosing interest and so behavioural flexibility then allows you to try a different approach in order to re kindle their interest same thing in the class also a teacher should use various methods flexible in the action to make a student more involved to motivate student a student to take interest in the subject so neurolinguistic programming teaches that those with the highest amount of behavioural flexibility are often the more successful now the person with a most flexibility will have more choices and therefore have most influence in any system a choice is better than no choice and more choices are certainly better than less choice yes it is said bigger cant be chooses naturally if you have more choices you are going to get success similarly if what you are doing is not working do something else this highlights the need to change ones behaviour and do something else again and again if need be until the desired outcome is achieved in other words one must be able to change readily to meet new circumstances so if something is not working for you it is about being flexible and changing your behaviour so every minute of our day we take in millions of pieces of information ah through the five senses that is sensory acuity at the conscious level we simply cant deal with that much information so our mind filtersthe information we receive into chunks of seven plus or minus two chunks containing about one thirty bits of information a second so what happens to the rest of the information well we delete distort or generalise it now distort and generalise it each of us will filter the information differently that is also flexibility as well as view things differently based on our person values beliefs attitude memories past experience and then decisions now n l p pre supposes that every one of us is responsible for our won life yes we are entirely responsible we can make our life happy we can make our life miserable so we may not be able to control external events but we are capable of controlling our own reactions and response to those events so if we keep reacting and responding in the same way we will always get the same result a person with flexibility will change repeatedly his behaviour whenever something he is doing is not working so he changes to trying something new until he achieves his goal that kind of determination that kind of persuasion requiredso flexibility applied as much to our behaviour as to our thought rigid attitude or thinking reduces the desired outcome in our interaction with other people so when successive attempts at wooing a member of opposite sex fails to gain headway is it no time to switch tactic now this n l p pre supposition applies to business organisation as well so in any workplace flexibility in management and individual employees encourages productivity and contributes to a harmonious working environment that is why it is said that giving some space to other is nothing but state to success so always be flexible enough to explore and search for an appropriate strategy what kind of a strategy is going to suit flexibility doesnt mean that you are always flexible flexibility means that if this strategy fails then whichmstrategy is going to be useful for the particular desired goal so whether for a better life or a better learning habit rather than being continuously stuck with something in the present that does not work yes very true it is better to quit and then start again with other strategy it is patently obvious that if you want something new you have to do something new and anything new could well be better than maintaining what is not working so changing our behaviour is not all that difficult when we believe there are many alternatives which we can choose and that solution to every difficulty is always available we just need to be prepared to try hard to seek it out all one needs is being flexible
Now in this context i want to quote again the pre supposition of neurolinguistic programming that map is not the territory though we discussed earlier this is the fundamental of neurolinguistic programming that people represent the world internally to create their own personal and subjective realities we respond mainly through our internal experience map of reality not to the external reality itself yes the perception your perception of something is different and my perception is something to different so two different perception of the same thing now it depends on your internal setting internal world so how we represent things in our mind are our interpretations now interpretations may or may not be accurate in any case these interpretations determine how we experience each moment and therefore let the foundation for our experience of reality in the future too now having choices about how to interpret your reality now changes your experience of it and having more choices available to you begins by choosing interpret each experience in a way what frees your thinking to explore different points of view so how else can you look at your situation and how else and how else in this your map of reality expand so the pre supposition map is not the territory that is the map of reality that is there inside you is not the reality the external reality is the real reality and that you need to find out now we respect each persons model of the world we could summit as we respect each other that is to say that it is not only your perception other perception also should be given respect just because someone else has a differentpoint of view or map of reality it doesnt mean that they are wrong or and you are right so ah aim to increase choice what are the aims by aiming to increase choice you are choosing expand your map of reality expand your map to one that gives you the widest and richest number of choices yes what is needed expansion the more choices you have the freer you are and the more influence you have over yourself and others now greater choice comes from being able to change your perpetual position the three perpetual position in n l p are associated to self in your body looking at the situation from yourpoint of view associated to other taking the other persons frame of references associated to observer or witness taking the meta or objective perceptive being fly on the wall so familiarising yourself with being in all three perceptual position and becoming comfortable in doing so in all context broaden your horizon broaden your scope of choice with practice one can assume multiple perceptual position simultaneously with that comes the freedomto more consciously choose your thought feelings and action in all types of situation now people make the best choice they can at the times now a person always makes the best choice they can given their map of reality at that time yes it is your internal choice that gives a kind of signal to the final choice the choice may be self defeating bizarre or evil but for them it seems the best way for what give them a better choice in their map of reality and they will take it even better help them upgrade their map to one with more choicesin it another way of putting this is we act according to the level of awareness that is available to us in that moment the reason why people regret certain past action is because they have greater awareness now and because of this phenomena they eventually overcome their current regret too so based on the premise of this pre supposition whoever cause the pain in the past did so based on their level of awareness at that time they were trying to fulfil a certain value in their old ah old map of reality and never knew how else to go about it back then so looking back on that past hurt from a broader and resourceful perspective in the present can enable healing and relapse of stuck emotion therefore the broader or perspectives now the more choices we have in the past presentand future that is to say that we have more space more room now people were perfectly no one is wrong or broken people function perfectly even if what they are doing is running their life all behaviour is has a structure so when you understand a structure you can change the behaviour and people carry out their behavioural strategies perfectly but the strategy may be poorly designed and ineffective so finding out finding out how you or othersdo what you or they do enable you or other then to change the ineffective strategy to one that is more suited to achieving useful and desirable results now all actions have a purpose yes even sleeping has purpose laughing has a purpose so our actions are not random it is with some purpose we are always trying to achieve something although we may not be aware of what that is behind each behaviour there is a positive intention this may be the anticipation of pleasure or avoidable or pain people want to achieve something that they value and which benefit them so n l p separates the intention or purpose behind an action form the action itself a person is not their behaviour when a person has a better choice of behaviour that also achieves their positive intention they will take itso when the behaviour is undesired that is unacceptable not favourable find alternate ways to achieve the behaviours positive intent seek to add choices and resources so when you take away choices other compensating behaviour can automatically occurso internal conflicts in decision procrastination and lack of motivation are often the result of conflicting values in our unconscious awareness establishing the highest intention or purposeof each conflicting value enables integration and in a alignment which results in greater choice and freedom that is very true we think and rethink there is a conflict in your mind and then finally you come up with a proper suggested decision so to change unwanted behaviours start by eliciting the highest positive intention which drives that behaviour then seek to satisfy that intention through more appropriate means so in order to be more understanding and compassionate to whats other seek to establish what their highest positive intentions are so we act according you are current level of awareness by bringing the underlined purpose of particular actions into awareness we create more possibilities for our self and our client yes this is the way so the meaning of your communication is not simply what you intent but also the response you get yes sender and receiver sending messages getting feedback so resistance in other indicates a lack of rapport or that the other person does not get your meaning so we all resist when we dont understand yes what what is the resistance against trying to understand you your intended communication is not always what is perceived so you cannot communicate we are always communicating either verbally or non verbally so even the absence of response is information yes i mean vacuum you are sending message but silence is a kind of information so each person deletes distorts and generalised pure sensory information and these filters are triggered by both verbal and non verbal behaviour in others now which is more importantwhat you intend to communicate or what you actually communicate flexible communication flexible communicator change what they are saying and how they are saying is as well their body language until the desired results are obtained so yes very important that howwhat you actually communicate is it meaningful or not it is verbal or non verbal everything everything does matter so we already have the resources we need or we can create them it is we who can exploit the resources i mean surrounding so you already have it in you you have potential dont think you dont have potential now how to exploit everything every person needs to effect positive change is already in them so may however not be consciously aware of it often people have resources that they have not considered or are availablein other context resources mean the internal responses and in external behaviours needed to get desired result so our most basic resource is our ability to learn that is why i repeatedly say that neurolinguistic programming is self discovery first you discover yourself then you discover other then you discover other resources and the others potential so there are no unresourceful person only unresoureful state of mind what is it mean that even the worst kind of thing once ah worst kind of person even he or she ah must have some kind of resource what is what does matter it is unresourceful state of mind how to exploit the potential that is attitude so as responsible able response able ah people we can run run our own mind and therefore move towards getting the results that we wantso the key to achieving this is through knowing how to change your state that is the state of mind that is the state of position as a specific resources are accessed only through being in the appropriate state so states are the keys that either open or lock the door to infinite reservoir of resources inside you now appropriate states are those that match the kind of resources that you would like to gain access to now for example to be confident state shift your body posture breathe and internal dialogue to that whichmatches confidence you will immediately begin to feel more confident yes there is also a mirror ah system where you can repeat you can practice now in the above way you can through changing your body posture breathe and internal dialogue assume any state through assuming appropriate state your thinking becomes clear new creative choices arise into awareness and empowered actions are the result now conversely we have all had the experience of begin being in a miserable state and you know how resourceful you felt then here i would like to add a very famous philosophy existentialism man is the creature that that suffers from crisis and then he or she tries to overcome the crisis that is called existential crisis ah philosophy and it is human being only that he or she hasthis quality to fight to come over so similarly you have to fight in the miserable state applying the various strategy and you have to come over so the hypnotic state is highly versatile state since it is often referred to as the master key to your inner resources hypnosis enables people to have direct contact with the level of their awareness that is usually unconscious so here hypnotherapy leverages the hypnotic state for the purpose of healing so whichever way you choose to go about it a state are the vein which you tap your inner wisdom and productive ways of thought to deal effectively with any situation now mind and body are connected the first presupposition i discussed with you while discussing theflexibility that mind is not the territory similarly mind and body are connected and form a system that is cohesiveness of your personality so it is clear how the mind and body effect each other prolonged stress or heavy emotional spell often result in physicalsickness likewise positive attitude joy laughter are not only healing for the body but also help prevent sickness so neurolinguistic programming i pattern reveal our internal sensory processingsome of the other physiological cues that indicate our mental processes are posture a speech and breathing rate since physiological cues reflect the functioning of your mind by changing particular physiological cues you can affect the functioning of your mind for example slumping in your chair can make you feel tired or taking a walk can uplift your thought yes very true i mean it is all your gesture and posture so mind and body interact and mutually influence each other it is not possible to make a change in one without the other being affected when we think differently our body change when we act differently we change our thoughts and feeling very true take care of cancer patient they just get over with the help of the positive thought that is if patient feels depressed and native he or she cannot survive so the same thing that we do so treating only mental emotional or physical symptoms without taking responsibility for the underlying region so such symptoms are manifested may disrupt the mind body system ignoring the subtle causes of unwanted system can result in more complex complications later for example regularly taking sleeping tablets to get enough sleep at night without addressing the mental emotionalcause like stress or dissatisfaction of not being able to sleep may lead to burn out ah or any disease so consciousness expresses itself through the system of your mind and body mind and body are therefore intimately linked and ultimately they are two aspectsof the same source now there is no such things as failure there is only feedback so legend had it that prior to thomas edison inventing the light bulb he was interrogated by a probing journalist who demanded to know why edison had failed some something like ah two hundred times to invent the light bulb that edison claimed was an imminent reality edisons reply went along the lines that he ah he had not failed to invent the light bulb two hundred times instead he had discovered two hundred ways to invent it very true not failureso with that kind of attitude edison was quite likely able to maintain a resourceful state and be positively maintained to persevere until his goal was reached so every result gives you feedback failure or error or whatever may be information about how to do somethingdifferently next time so every experience offers a positive learning one from which we can grow intellectually or in terms of emotional intelligence so ah now here come for useful n l p technique because these are all n l p technique but n l p techniques can be used in many situations now one of the very important important technique is mirroring which is very useful when you want to put someone at ease so that you can influence them now what is mirroring it is quite simply creating mirror image of their body language for instance if if they cross their arms you cross your arm but make sure that you create a mirror image if they cross their right arm over their left arm then you need to cross your left arm over your right arm this is called mirror image so the effect of mirroring is that the other persons subconsciously notices that you are behaving in the same way that they are behaving and this leads them to believe that you must like and respect them and a kind of bonding a kind of relaxation now the other is swish patterning the swish pattern is one of the most powerful n l p techniques for making changes in your behaviour and feeling so it is a very simple method of taking an old unwanted behaviour and substituting with the new empowering behaviour the swish patterning is particularly useful in situationswhere you repeatedly find yourself underperforming even though you feel sure that you could do much better if only nervousness would not get in the way so t is also common for people who prevaricate about starting task to suddenly find that they throw themselves into those same task with energy ideas and enthusiasm and next is modelling was the first of the n l p technique developed by bandler and john grinder so the basic idea is to locate anotherperson who poses a skill that you would like to have and then ask ah how do they do that now by breaking down elements of what they do you are then in a position to be able to replicate those skills in your behaviour so ah bandler and grinder started by studyingthe work of leading healers such as virginia satir and milton erickson they were looking for the behavioural differences between these great healer and other who were less successful now through these studies they became aware of the power of the unconscious mind and how it affects our everyday behaviour so they learnt that the unconscious mind can be reprogrammed so that our behaviour can be changed now in organisations modelling can be used to discover what to performers do that is different from their colleaguesand to transfer those skills to everyone else when you do this successfully you can raise the overall level of performance the ability of top performers is usually the result of their unique blend of feeling thought belief values and self image it therefore essentialto identify the thinking strategies and other intangibles that make top managers outstanding now next unique useful n l p technique is anchoring of all the n l p techniques anchoring is probably the most simple and in many ways the most useful anchoring is simple creating an aide memoire that is already there in your memory for a new state which you have created for yourself an anchor can be any physical act that you choose it could be as simple as crossing your fingers or it could be digging the nails of your right fingers into the palm of your right hand or it could be consciously showing your teeth to all around you so the procedure for creating an anchor is very simple first get yourself to feel the state the you want to feel then anchor the that state then next time you want to feel that way again simply fire ah your anchor now the next one is metaphor it is a natural human behaviour to tell stories in n l p we call such stories metaphors so they are one of the most useful techniques because they are so natural and so common in any society and one can describe one situation by metaphor for instance you might say this is the happiest day i am having a joyful time or you might hear someone say i am having a really ah tough day nothing seems to be going according to plan so this is all about the useful n l p technique friends what is needed this is all theory what is required that you apply it you think over it you go through it to make the new strategy i am sure that you could be able to get success in your life thank you very much i am looking forward to meeting you again with new exercise of neurolinguistic programming thank you once again.
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